Sun Aug 23 17:20:22 PDT 2015

The Art of Dealing with People by Les Giblin

The Art of Dealing with People
(The Art of Dealing with People)

A short read. This book(let) reminds you of the criticality of not damaging the ego of another person. Excellent advice - Dale Carnegie-like - but difficult to apply in practice - because it goes against our naturally selfish tendancies. Here is the basic structure of the book.

  • Thinking creatively about human relations
    • If you want to get anything done - you had better be able to get along with other people
  • Understanding the human ego
    • Recognizing that everyone is egotistical, selfishly interested in themselves, wants to amount to something and wants to be feel approval
    • A starved ego is a mean ego
  • Making people feel important
    • Think others are important
    • Notice people
    • Don't compete with people
    • Know when to correct people
  • Controlling the actions and attitudes of others
    • Be confident
    • Walk confidently
    • Shake hands confidently
    • Moderate your voice
    • Smile
    • Impute virtue in others
  • Creating a good impression
    • Don't wear a disguise
    • Don't knock the competition
  • Developing an attractive personality
    • Accept, approve and appreciate others
  • Learning to communicate effectively
    • Don't try to be perfect
    • Get people talking about themselves
    • Don't tease and don't be sarcastic
  • Listening
    • Listening makes you clever, so...
    • Look at the person who is talking
    • Appear deeply interested
    • Lean towards the person
    • Ask questions
    • Don't interrupt, ask for more
    • Stick to the speaker's subject
    • User the speaker's words
  • Convincing others
    • Allow others to speak to state their case
    • Pause before you answer
    • Don't insist on winning 100%
    • State you case moderately
    • Speak through third parties
    • Allow others to save face
    • 'I felt the same way about it at first, until I ran acorss this information which changed the picture'
  • Giving praise
    • Sincerity
    • Speak up
    • Thank people by name
    • Look at people when you thank them
    • Work at thanking people
    • Thank people when they least expect it
  • Criticizing without offending
    • Criticize in private
    • Preface criticism with a kind word
    • Criticize the act not the person
    • Supply the answer
    • Ask for cooperation
    • One criticism to an offence
    • Finish in a friendly fashion

Comments are closed

If you would like to get in touch with me, please mail zfs at

recent comments

Posted by ZFS | Permanent link | File under: reviews
[StumbleUpon] [Digg] [Reddit] [Facebook] [Google]